LaShara Lashawn

Since when did expressing prefferences make you a hater?

Alright I guess I can say that I am on the dating scene. I am very open to meeting nice young men. Going through my 20s I have come to meet so many different types of men and they were all pretty great in the begining. I like to believe I have great taste but I mean after a few months you really start to see who the person is and I am not saying that like I am some cookie cutter perfect person becuase I am not.

This blog was going to be a rant at first but then I realized that would not help anything at all. If I may I would like to share somethings that I have realized are my non negotioables and things that just dont work for me. Again I have met different men of different ages, ethnic backgrounds, religions, social classes and honestly I still can’t tell you and wont say that they are or were all the same. I wish I could but I can’t even do it. I like men who care, who like people, who are considerate, who are generous, who are productive, who are driven, who can take suggestions and can listen not just HEAR! I felt my self getting a little triggered there, excuse me. As I was saying those are in my opinion very basic but guess what people arent like that and I believe that people who arent like that are here for a reason, to be someones test, the outlier, the pain in someones side, the living example of what not to be hooked up with.

This is what has got me so confused because if you say you wear a size 9 and maybe a 9.5 depending on the shoe and the sales man keeps bringing you a size 11 in a shoe you didn’t ask for you have every right to say no thank you. No matter if its 50% off, the only pair left, or the sales persons favorite, the shoe isnt a fit for you. If the salesperson gets an attitude with you and starts to rant and get mad that’s a bit crazy isnt it?? This was a dating experience for me a few times! I am not about to accept something that clearly isnt a fit for me. I am now okay with openly saying that. It no longer matters so much about the benefits, if I cant do it or if the other person is not open to changes from dealing with me then it’s best I leave them where they are at. Simple. I truely believe that how a person is in regards to the qualities I mentioned above says a lot about who they are. For example, I like a person who cares. Now that is very broad, I know but what I mean is a person who cares about people, relationships, his woman, him self, his home, apperance and other meaninful intities. I’v met people who have presented themselves like super caring individuals but it is all a facade.

It’s the list of what the man wants that they dont even meet or are even actively trying to attain for themselves that’s really got my scratching my head. How are people still walking around with that mindset? Oh and then there are the ones who swear they are God’s gift. I could go on, but I’m not here to bash or rant, just share. I hope I am able to help someone. I am just trying to navigate the dating scene and as my aunt told me dating is just collecting information. Every date wont lead to me being at the alter or even the bedroom and I do not expect it to. I like meeting people and nurturing relationships, healthy ones!

Im open to reading about others experiences, feel free to share.