LaShara Lashawn

Given that I do not have the notifications set on majority of my apps I have to make a note or just remember to check them regulary. I especially dont have it turned on for this app because I dont want to get to consumed with it. I think it can become addictive if you let it.

Alright so after swiping several times there have been a few that I swiped for by mistake and when that happens I get so irritated! It like butt dialing someone that you had no intention of talking to and you hang up hoping the call didnt go through on their end. Welp, too late sis they seen it!! What do you know, its a “match!!” When I make the mistake I dont even send a text at all. Why? because there is nothing to say. “Hi, I know I swiped on your picture that I think is terrible but Im really not interested” uuumm no, I think I just wont say anything.

Then there are the guys that I think are handsom and its a match. Sometimes I am shocked that they even liked my pic or maybe it was an accident too. So here I am debating if I should say something or just wait. Most of the time I wait. Now once a conversation has been started I have to make sure I stick to my guns. Im not talking about sex, not planing dates, I don’t even want your number right off the bat. Just to fast forward a bit I did have a converstion with a guy who we will call Speedy. I was swiping through the app and he was nice on the eyes, nice smile, good build from what I could tell seem super cool. I swiped for him and it was a match, he messages me and after the basic introductions he seem alright,  he wasnt a perv (asking for nudes), he used commas and spelled out the words in his messages, he knew the lord and kept a good response time.

Speedy’s conversations was not dry at all, I mean I found myself laughing out loud…like for real! When I would ask him questions he would answer them but he really would’nt go too deep, which I took as him being cautious. For some reason I have this thing about me that everyone should just trust me from jump. Yet the whole time I’m wanting them to trust me I am super skeptical of them. I know, makes no sense but in my mind I know that I am a great person and that a person can trust me with their secrets and I will be honest with them and for that reason they should just see it in me. Speedy was showing to be a cool dude as the days went by, he wasn’t the text you good morning/ good night every day type which was  fine with me since I’m pretty busy.

We had a good flow going, so he gave me his number. Next thing I know I am in a realtionship, like wait a damn minute here, sir! I mean he flipped the script on me and fast at that!! Speedy was always checking for my location, asking if I was talking to other guys, If I did not respond fast enough he would send “???” or accuse me of ignoring him. That right there was teewww much for me, so after that I  decided I will wait to get the number. I will take time to ask more questions. Some things that I have asked and will ask with my next match will be things like:

What’s your name? (people be using alias)

How old are you?

Tell me something about yourself.

Why are you on the app?

What do you do for a living and what excites you?

Are you happy with your life right now?

These are a few things and then we can possibly get into more fun and casual conversation. I believe that for me it is important to establish some form of trust, comfort and boundaries. It is from this point that I may be more inclinded to exchanging phone numbers and maybe even meeting up in person. Actually on second thought I might just keep the conversation on the app until we meet up in person.

The conversation really sets the tone and it is my hope that at least I can meet some cool people and make some connects and friends.