LaShara Lashawn

All we get is one life. Yet we are given so many opportunities to make the life we want. I was told by a wise person once that ” our choices from our past determine our today.” What this means is that what we do right now, what we say, the choices and opportunities we take or don’t take will effect our tomorrow. I have tested this and found it to be true. This quote isn’t speaking to bad choices or good choices specifically, but all choices. There are times where I will think over my life and how far I have come, some accomplishments, highlights, some lows and missed marks. In my mind I may even go as far as to wonder the “what ifs.” What if I left for college, moved away, stayed at a particular job or never moved out my parents house?

I understand that we cant help the family or economic status that we are born into. Yet we see time and time again people who make it out and rise above. That doesn’t mean that the rest of us are going to have a poor, unfulfilled life. We all cant be millionaires not that we all want to be one. I believe that most of us just want to be comfortable, be healthy, be able to pay our bills and have some fun. I mean being a millionaire would be nice too. That’s a nice wish. If I could wish for anything I would like to be able to travel and backpack around for like a month. I sounds super exciting and yet scary at the same time. I don’t know how I would fun this or what I would do while I was away and really it doesn’t matter much. I just hope to be able to have some time to just explore and learn about different cultures.

Traveling is apart of my self care. I make it a goal to go somewhere throughout the year.  I see it as therapy. It’s something about being in a place I have never been before. One of my biggest issue is that I don’t always have someone to come along. If I ask a guy then we have to clarify under what tittles will we be traveling under like why does it matter cuz???? can you come or not? I had a guy tell me that traveling with a girl is what you do only with your girlfriend. So my response after a serious eye roll was ” so we can drive to Sacramento as just friends, but once we leave the state on a plane then its something else?” apparently friendships cant pass state lines. His loss. Finding a good travel buddy is pretty tough, as I have learned you cant travel with everyone.

Creating the life you want can be difficult but its the small wins that count. For me, paying off debt, being comfortable with saying no, saving money, spending time with family, going to the gym consistently, reading more and creating. Sadly there are people who don’t see their life as their own. It is always about what someone else did that prevent them from doing XYZ. This pessimistic attitude is the most draining energy ever. All I want is to show love, be loved, do things that make me happy, try something new, travel, and be a better believer. When I decided to take my life back and do things that made me happier I had to examine myself and what I found was that I was the problem. I was being a poor manager of myself. I was always late, I never gave to much of anything my all or my best work, I was afraid of my mail box, I spent my money on things I didn’t need and I was carrying a lot of past hurt and trauma. It was important for me to look myself in the mirror and really love what I saw.

It took time to deal with my baggage and commit to making change. my mess had become comfortable it was what I knew. The down side was that I’m smart and I frankly don’t like dysfunction. So if you want to know how to create the life you want all you have to do is make a choice, celebrate the small wins, treat others good, forgive, deal with your mess and be happy. You only get one life and it is up to you to make it the best one you can. The better I am to myself the better I can be for my family.